7-yr old girl kicked off team...for being a girl

"Excuse me, young lady. Yes, you. I know you're only seven, but try and understand this. You can't play on our baseball team anymore because you're a girl. Now, run along and play with your dolls or paint your nails." Now that quote was purely from my imagination. I don't think anyone would actually say that to a kid. Would they? Well, that might happen if you live in Allen, Texas. That did happen if your name is Anna Kimball. Anna plays baseball on her local pre-Little League team. She and her younger brother, Carson are teammates. Check that. They were teammates. Anna's mom was notified by the team's coach that Anna would not be welcomed back on the team this season. The KDFW story below explains why (Email subscribers click here).



This is obviously sexist and as the father of a young girl, I'm boiling as I write this piece. However, the failure here goes deeper than sexism. This situation shines a light on the overwhelming ignorance in youth sports. It highlights the selfishness of adults who honestly cannot see the forest for the trees. The fact that there's a "more competitive" league for six and seven-year-olds is ludicrous on its face. Look at the video again. Watch young Carson. He's a good-looking kid and I'm sure he plays hard, but what does "more competitive" look like for him? Seriously, what goes on in a "more competitive" baseball league where the kids are still in CAR SEATS?! Maybe Carson can hit a four-seam fastball. Maybe he can hit a circle change-up. I know. He must be able to turn an unassisted triple play.

Moreover, when you watch the video again, listen to what Carson says. He doesn't want to play baseball without Anna. The fact that he said such a thing represents the greatest failure of his coach. If any kid quits because of an action you take as a coach, you have failed. Period. We need to really examine the reasons why we participate as coaches in youth sports. The "more competitive" league and the rec league buy their trophies from the same shop. There is no hall of fame for the best six-year-old team coach. ESPN will not interview you. The reward from coaching Anna, Carson and other kids like them is in their smiles. The reward comes from them saying they had the most fun they ever had playing for you. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More

Need a good coach? Get yourself a Mac.

From L-R: Brigade member Evelyn Austin, Parker Curl and Richard McIntosh

The Sportsmanship Brigade made its first visit to the St. Louis Jewish Community Center (The "J") on Saturday. Kindergarteners from Our Lady of The Pillar took on the aptly named "Heat" team of first graders from The "J". Now the score got out of hand fairly quickly as the first grade team took control. However, Our Lady of the Pillar coach Richard McIntosh never allowed his young players to think they were doing anything less than playing well. The 7u division at The "J" is a teaching league which allows coaches to be on the court with the kids. McIntosh jogged from end to end giving his kids instructions and encouraging them. Even when the Heat team hit what seemed to be impossible shots, McIntosh's expression never changed and he never alarmed the kids with any out of control behavior. Rewarding Coach McIntosh was a no-brainer for the Brigade.

Then we had young Parker Curl from the Heat. Parker's team took good shots, passed the ball well and played good defense. They are a fundamentally sound group of kids who never beat their chests or tried to rub their eventual victory in the faces of the younger team. Parker stood out during a play in the second half when an Our Lady of Pillar kid fell to the floor. The young man wasn't hurt, but it was good to see Parker show leadership and turn back to help him up and continue playing. Even in first grade, Parker showed the type of maturity that will take him far in sports and in life. Brigade members saw fit to recognize him as well.

The Sportsmanship Brigade is a group of Sports Commission volunteers who visit youth sporting events looking for acts of good sportsmanship. Athletes, parents, coaches and fans who display good sportsmanship are rewarded with a certificate of recognition and a gift card to a local business. For more information about the Sportsmanship Brigade, including scheduling and volunteer information, please click here or call 314-345-5130. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More

CYC 6th grader turns injury into inspiration

St. Joan of Arc was down 8-4 to St. James halfway through the third quarter in a CYC 6th grade basketball matchup earlier this evening. Then, something happened that sucked the collective breath out of the gym. Joan of Arc guard George Buckingham hustled to grab a loose ball that was headed out of bounds. His momentum carried him into the un-padded portion of the wall. The smack of concrete against his 11-year-old spine sent chills throughout the building. George's mom jumped from the top row of the bleachers in what looked like a single bound and ran to her son. One of the Joan of Arc assistant coaches is a firefighter and ran to George's aid as well.

He was on the floor for several minutes. Thankfully, George was able to stand and walked gingerly to the bench. After some ice and TLC from mom, George was back in the game. The young man decided to wear his injury as a captain's badge and began encouraging his teammates to hustle and get back down the court on defense. Every pass, assist and shot came with a grimace of pain for George. He didn't stop playing and he didn't complain. Another Joan of Arc player scored a basket that gave the team its first lead late in the fourth quarter. George was the first to meet his teammate and pat him on the back. St. Joan of Arc went on to win the game 15-14. The Sportsmanship Brigade chose George as today's award winner.

I explained to him that he didn't receive the award because his team won. He received the award because he used his injury to uplift his team. He could have easily stayed out of the game and let his mom take care of him. No one would have blamed him for that. However, he showed the character and spirit of a true champion. He used his gifts to make others better. This was a grand way to start 2012 for the Sportsmanship Brigade and we are looking forward to more as the basketball season wears on. The Sportsmanship Brigade is a group of Sports Commission volunteers who visit youth sporting events looking for acts of good sportsmanship. Athletes, parents, coaches and fans who display good sportsmanship are rewarded with a certificate of recognition and a gift card to a local business. For more information about the Sportsmanship Brigade, including scheduling and volunteer information, please click here or call 314-345-5130. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More

Young 49ers fan shows character beyond his years

Anyone who watched last week's NFC Championship between the San Francisco 49ers and the New York Giants witnessed an athlete's worst nightmare come to fruition. San Francisco punt returner Kyle Williams inadvertently touched the football on a punt, which led to a Giants touchdown. In the overtime period, Williams fumbled another punt deep in his own end. This led to a game-winning field goal for New York. Williams has received all kinds of hate mail and death threats this week from fans. The disconnect between reality and fantasy for many fans would be comical if it weren't so sickening. Yes, Kyle Williams' performance probably cost the 49ers a chance to go to the Super Bowl, but so what?!

It's not the end of the world. San Francisco head coach Jim Harbaugh now gets to coach the NFC Pro Bowl team in Hawaii this week. Because the 49ers are a good team, several of their players get to go to Hawaii as well - not to mention the healthy playoff bonuses I'm sure all the players get for making it to the NFC Championship. Fans need to get a grip too. You have a good, young team with good players who will probably contend for a championship next year. I think I need a little help making this point. Maybe my new friend Owen can provide some assistance. Now I've never met Owen, but I came across a story about a letter he wrote to Kyle Williams. Owen  is a 7-year-old 49ers fan who was watching the game with his dad last Sunday.

Owen was distraught over the loss. He was crying and asking his dad why Williams had to fumble. Owen's dad asked him, "If you feel this way, how sad do you think Kyle Williams is?" This was expert parenting by dad. He encouraged his son to think of someone else. Owen then asked his dad if he could write Williams a letter. Here it is in Owen's own handwriting:

In case you're having a little trouble reading Owen's handwriting, the full text is provided below. I chose not to edit the text, either. What the heck? Owen's seven.

Dear Mr. Williams

We just watched the Playoff game. I feel really bad for you but I wanted to tell you that you had a great season. you should be very proud, so I wanted to say thank you.

I am your #1 FAN!

Owen Shure

Los Angeles, CA

p.s. your awesome

Owen, we think you're pretty awesome too. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More

Sportsmanship Brigade coming to CYC and The "J"

The Sportsmanship Brigade is a group of Sports Commission volunteers who visit youth sporting events looking for acts of good sportsmanship. Athletes, parents, coaches, and fans who display good sportsmanship are rewarded with a certificate of recognition and a gift card to a local business. I'm proud to announce that we've reached agreement with the St. Louis Catholic Youth Council (CYC) and the St. Louis Jewish Community Center (The "J") to attend youth basketball games at their facilities through the end of March 2012.

This is more than just an opportunity to reward good people for practicing good sportsmanship. It's an opportunity to show the world that most of the time in most communities, kids are having fun and enjoying a positive sports experience. We'll visit CYC six times and The "J" four times beginning this Friday and concluding on March 23. Before I post the full schedule below, it's important to note that we are always looking for new youth leagues to visit and we're always in need of volunteer help to make our visits possible.  If your organization would like to get on the Brigade schedule or you would like to serve as a Brigade volunteer, please click here or call 314-345-5130. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Catholic Youth Council (CYC) Schedule

Date	Location	Matchup	Time
1/27	Loyola Academy – 3851 Washington Blvd. 63108	St. Gabriel v. DeLaSalle	6 p.m.
2/3	Sacred Heart -  Valley Park – 12 Ann Ave. 63088	Sacred Heart v. MQP	6 p.m.
2/10	Holy Spirit – 3130 Parkwood Lane - 63043	Holy Spirit v. St. Joe	6 p.m.
2/24	Cross Keys – 14205 Cougar Drive - 63033	Sacred Heart – Florissant v. St. Rose	6:15 p.m.
3/23	St. Angela Merici – 3860 N. US Hwy 67 (Lindbergh) - 63034	St. Rose v. St. Martin OL Guadalupe v. St. Rose	6:15 p.m. 7:25 p.m.

St. Louis Jewish Community Center (The J) Schedule

Date	Location	Matchup	Time
1/28	Staenberg Family Complex in Creve Coeur – 2 Millstone Campus Drive - 63146	7u basketball	1 p.m.
2/4	Marilyn Fox Building in Chesterfield – 16801 Baxter Road - 63005	10u basketball	10:15 a.m.
2/18	Staenberg Family Complex in Creve Coeur – 2 Millstone Campus Drive - 63146	7u basketball	1:15 p.m.
3/10	Marilyn Fox Building in Chesterfield – 16801 Baxter Road - 63005	11u basketball	11:30 a.m.

Read More

Coach resigns due to "extreme parental interference"

Coach Wayne Gigante

Grosse Point Woods (Mich.) University Liggett High girls basketball coach Wayne Gigante resigned from his position earlier this month. Why? Well, it wasn't because of a lack of success. The Liggett program has a great won-loss record. They were 25-2 last year and started this year 3-1. Nothing inappropriate happened relative to the kids either. So why would a successful coach walk away after only 2 1/2 years on the job? In his resignation letter to the school administration, Gigante cited "extreme parental interference" as the reason why he no longer wanted to be Liggett's coach.

What does "extreme parental interference" mean? You and I could probably figure out what that means, but it's better coming from the coach himself. Here is what Coach Gigante told the Detroit News about his departure:

"That team is so capable of winning the state championship and it's killing me to step down since I've helped build something special the last 2 1/2 years. I've been coaching basketball for 10 years and never had a problem with a player. We know what we want to do. We know what the kids are capable of doing. I had a good feel for this team, but I can't do it anymore. There can only be one voice, and that has to be the coach. You can't have kids looking up in the stands for instructions. It's too much of a disruption. Dad needs to be up in the stands supporting his kids, not coaching them. This has been building up and it was just time. Maybe the pressure will be off the players now. Kids are supposed to have fun."

I've never had the pleasure of meeting Coach Gigante, but his sentiments are spot-on. He echoed exactly what's been said by the Sports Commission, NAIA, Positive Coaching Alliance, and many others. Kids want and need to have fun when participating in sports. Having mom and dad yell instructions from the stands is not fun. In this case, a successful coach stepped down because the environment wasn't fun for kids. There is, however, a simple, three-word solution to this problem - Know. Your. Role. You can be an athlete, coach, official or fan. Choose one and respect the others. Go to sportsmanship.org and click the Get Involved icon. Download the Through A Child's Eyes booklet and make as many copies as you need for every adult in your organization. Learn why knowing our roles is so important for our kids' success on and off the field or court. We all know good coaches are hard to find - especially if they're running away from you. Make a positive change today. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More

Alexander talks sportsmanship on KSDK

We released our Ten Worst Sportsmanship Moments of 2011 last week. Here's my segment on KSDK-TV in St. Louis - which aired earlier today (email subscribers click here).
The list serves as a reminder of what can happen if we don't work to make youth sports the most positive environment for kids it can be. We have to do better. We must set better examples. Go to sportsmanship.org to find out how you can affect positive change and promote good sportsmanship in your youth league or association. Our kids are counting on us. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Related Link(s): Top 10 Worst Sportsmanship Moments from the STL Sports Commission - stltoday.com.
                         St. Louis Sports Commission Worst Sportsmanship Moments - fox2now.com.

Read More

2012 St. Louis Youth Sports Summit in pictures

2012 St. Louis Youth Sports Summit, a set on Flickr.

Two hundred youth sports parents, coaches, and administrators came out to Maryville University for the 3rd annual St. Louis Youth Sports Summit on Saturday. SLU basketball legend and Sports Commission Board Member Scott Highmark gave a tremendous keynote "Pep Talk." Kristin Gillette and Lane Green delivered valuable information and insight in their respective Coaching Leadership and Sports Parenting sessions. Bill Bommarito was an outstanding partner for our large group session and the American Heart Association volunteers were top-notch during CPR Training. My Social Media session was certainly well-attended. I hope participants left knowing a little more about social media than they did before.

We couldn't have done any of this without the support of Maryville University. Tom, Sue, Chris, Barb, Bob and Ernie...you all definitely live up to Maryville's "Saints" nickname. Aside from hosting, the technical and operational support we received was priceless. I want to thank our Sports Commission staff as well. Marc, Brent, Kristin, Chris, Emily, and Tim are the best staff in the business. Special thanks to our president Frank Viverito for his support and unwavering belief in me.

Finally, I want to thank each and every one of the parents, coaches and administrators who made yet another sacrifice for kids. You showed your commitment by your presence. Your kids are very fortunate to have such dedicated people looking out for their well-being. Thanks for all you do for the children in the St. Louis region. Enjoy the photos and there'll be more later in the week. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More

Haven't taught in 5 years...now I have a captive audience.

Read More

Parents: It's not about you

Geismar (La.) Dutchtown High School safety Landon Collins announced his college choice last week during the Under Armor High School Football All America Game. The New Orleans native had narrowed his decision to two schools - Louisiana State University (LSU) and the University of Alabama. In the video below, Collins discusses the process he went through and ultimately announces his decision (email subscribers click here). Pay close attention to his family's reaction. Please refer to the title of this post and remember it. It's not about us as adults. This young man has done well enough on and off the field to have his choice of the two schools playing for college football's national championship. He chose Alabama. So, what? Collins will get a free education. His games will be on national television and I'm sure pro scouts already have him on their radar. However, his mother is acting as if someone just stole her bike. She even starts cheering for the school he didn't choose.

When Dari Nowkhah of ESPN asked Collins about the LSU fan reaction back home, did you catch what he said? "...I guess she'll still supports me." While Nowkhah asked about fans in general, Collins' answer was specific. He only cares that his mom supports him and it's clear she does not. Other family members come in toward the end to hug him, but the hurt on the young man's face is evident. Parents, it's about what's best for the kids. Whether they're playing Division I football or they're the back-up linebacker on their middle school team, we are the support system.

Never should a kid feel alone when sitting next to his mother. Our kids should always feel like they are the greatest gift we were ever given.  I've heard parents say they'd run through a brick wall for their son or daughter. Well, sometimes they don't need that. Sometimes, they just need a hug. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More

Coach tells student body to "grow a pair"

Erie (Pa.) Cathedral Prep cross country coach Chet Moffett has been suspended from his duties because of an email he sent to the entire student body at the all-boys school. Cathedral Prep played local rival General McLane High School in basketball before the holiday break. Moffett took offense to what he thought was a lack of school spirit by Cathedral Prep students. Here is what he wrote in the email:

Gentlemen --
I wanted to drop you all a line and give you my thoughts on Tuesday's basketball game at general mcLame. I have been a coach here at Prep since 1998; so I have witnessed my share of close games (wins and losses), and I am fine with that. What I am not ok with is the fact that during the game, the GM student body out did us! It pains me to say that, but it's true. I was perplexed about this during the game, because I did notice that we had our usual cast that have showed incredible school spirit in the past; then after the game, I counted 36 (and I'm sure I missed a few) Prep students that chose not to sit in the cheering section. Gentlemen -- that is unacceptable!!

I asked one student that did not sit in the cheering section and his reply was, "I wanted to sit with my girlfriend". My reply was simple, "If she made or wanted you sit with her, then she is a high maintenance, selfish pig and you should dump her now and if you wanted to sit with her and ignore your brethren on the floor, then join [a former Prep student who since has transferred] at mercyworst!" In other words there is no excuse! Another student told me that he wanted to sit with his parents. My reply, "Cut the umbilical cord and grow a pair!" In other words there is no excuse! Another kid told me that he just wanted to "hang out with his friends". I had no reply; I have no patience for boy lovers! Guys -- there are no excuses for not cheering for your school!

Understand guys -- we set the standard with our cheering section! We were named the best fans in the state by the Pittsburgh Post Gazette! That's 150 miles away! Every news crew in this town wants to cover our games because of our cheering section! The 36 plus that didn't cheer for their school (and you know who you are) should be ashamed of themselves! You have chosen to be a part of a Brotherhood that no other school will ever understand! Your classmates make sacrifices in blood, sweat, tears to represent this school -- show your support!

Every game we go to our goal should be to make the opposing team, their family and their coaches as uncomfortable as possible! I hold the entire school accountable! Never should a bunch of mayonnaise sandwich eating, sister loving, trailer park dwelling clowns at general mclane ever chant "we can't hear you" to Cathedral Prep! Let's show our support to all winter sports (basketball, hockey, swimming and wrestling) and do it the Cathedral Prep way!

Please fix this!

Have a wonderful holiday,Coach Moffett  


So, a young man can't sit with his girlfriend, his parents, or just hang out with his friends at a basketball game. I wonder if Coach Moffett proofread his email before he sent it. You know - checked for spelling errors, spacing faux pas, or I don't know...homophobic, sexist, and wholly inappropriate insults! He put down the kids at his school and kids from another school he doesn't know. This behavior has to stop. The notion that a high school basketball game trumps all else is absurd. A young man should be able to sit next to his girlfriend, his parents, or just goof off with the guys if he wants. Our perspective as adults has to change. Go to sportsmanship.org and find out what you can do to help change perspectives in your school, youth league or organization. We love the game, but it's just a game. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More

Summer Sanders on Sports Parenting

Summer Sanders won two gold medals in swimming at the 1992 Summer Olympics in Barcelona. She also earned multiple titles during her collegiate career at Stanford University. As you might imagine, Sanders has been involved in swimming most of her life. You may further deduce that Sanders had very demanding parents who pushed her hard when it came to swimming. Not so fast, my friend. Watch the Positive Coaching Alliance video below as Sanders explains the role her parents had in her swimming career (email subscribers click here).




The 2012 St. Louis Youth Sports Summit will also have a breakout session on Sports Parenting that will give more insight into the role of parents. Parents have the greatest influence over their kids' lives and we will provide the tools necessary to help you support them on the field, court, or in the pool. The St. Louis Youth Sports Summit also features breakout sessions on CPR and social media respectively, a large group session on Coaching Leadership and so much more. The 2012 St. Louis Youth Sports Summit takes place on January 14 from 8:30 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. at Maryville University. The event is free, but you must register in order to attend. To RSVP, please go to sportsmanship.org or call 314-345-5130. Until next time...

Be a Good Sport!

-Sol

Read More